The journey back to Peshawar was one long dance party. We had bought a cassette or two at Illusions and one of them featured some exquisite dance titles. I don't usually dance, unless there's like a wedding in which case I dance like there's no tomorrow, but this was different. Maybe it was because I felt so good, because once I got up, there was no sitting down. There was nothing at that moment, just me and Uzair, trying to come up with new and wacky dance moves to try out on the run. That cassette must have run its course three times before I finally sat down gasping for breath. For a fat guy, Uzair sure can dance. There was nothing much of note to write about coming back except maybe for a deep feeling of regret; of having wonderful friends right there but not knowing it. The person in question and me texted each other like a dozen times or so, telling each other about the trip, bitching about other people and their undignified behaviour and how we were both sorry we hadn't realized the fact that we could have been best friends earlier and so on and so forth, but all in all, this was one trip I will never ever forget.
Laser Tag Rules!!!
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Saturday, April 15, 2006
Nobody Knows It But Me - Tony Rich Project
I pretended that I'm glad you went away
These four walls closin' more every day
And I'm dying inside
And nobody knows it but me
Like a clown I put on a show
The pain is real even if nobody knows
And I'm crying inside
And nobody knows it but me
Why didn't I say
The things I needed to say
How could I let my angel get away
Now my world is just a tumblin' down
I can say it so clearly
But you're nowhere around
The nights are lonely, the days are so sad
And I just keep thinkin' about
The love that we had
And I'm missin' you
And nobody knows it but me
I carry a smile when I'm broken in two
And I'm nobody without someone like you
I'm tremblin' inside and nobody knows it but me
I lie awake it's a quarter past three
I'm screamin' at night as if I thought
You'd hear me
Yeah my heart is callin' you
And nobody knows it but me
How blue can I get
You could ask my heart
But like a jigsaw puzzle it's been torn all apart
A million words couldn't say just how I feel
A million years from now you know
I'll be lovin' you still
The nights are lonely, the days are so sad
And I just keep thinkin' about
The love that we had
And I'm missin' you
And nobody knows it but me
Tomorrow mornin' I'm hitting the dusty road
Gonna find you wherever, ever you might go
I'm gonna unload my heart and hope you come back to me
Said when the nights are lonely...
The nights are lonely, the days are so sad
And I just keep thinkin' about
The love that we had
And I'm missin' you
And nobody knows it but me
Monday, April 03, 2006
School Trip to Islamabad - Part 2
Plans had been made beforehand to charm the socks off everybody with Waris Baig's beautiful, haunting melodies. Therefore, the bus was treated to such classics as 'Aik aankh milli dilbar say, woh bheegi shaam suhaani thee' and 'Kull shub mae nay daika chaand jarokay(?) may, uss ko keeya salaam tumhaaray dhokay may'. Many a protest was held but since nobody else had a cassette, they had to make do *hehehehehehe*. Not that we didn't sing songs ourselves, far from it; many a beautiful song permeated from the back seat that we occupied, and many a cigarette was lit and held near a window so that the smell didn't accompany the song. These cigarettes had to be disposed off after a quick drag from everybody because the only thing that spreads faster than cigarette smoke is a fart, and thank God we had none of those.We screamed, we laughed, we sang, we jumped, we sat on the seat back rests and took pictures, we danced but importantly we had fun. As time went by, I slowly realized that I was having fun after God knows how many trips. Don't ask me why because I won't tell you even if you do but it felt, oh soooooo, good.
First stop was Shakkarparriyan. It's pretty little place cut up into the hills somewhere above Islamabad. Marble benches and columns dot the place and there's steps everywhere. Going up, down, sideways. Nice little place I guess. I'm always drawn to vistas where I can spend some time alone and just gaze out at like a forest or a city or something. Oh well, spent some time there. Some of us went on a pirate boat, some of us climbed trees, some of us got into a police pickup van and took pictures in the back (yeah, that'll happen one of these days for sure), some of us got high on hash and I just sat on a stair step writing down what I thought about a friend in her diary. Then, onwards to Jinnah Super, where one of us actually went to get a hair-cut. Was well funny as the guy messed up his hair. The only thing worth mentioning here (cos it gives me brownie points) is the fact that I bought a pair of earrings for another friend who had to miss the trip and who I had spent most of the night texting and consoling. I felt really bad she had missed it, cos she's like my best friend and I hate it when I hear her crying. Had lunch and then it was off to that MegaZone place cos people wanted to bowl and play laser tag and stuff. Now this place gives me bad bad vibes; this is the place where I broke down on the last trip and cried for like a good one hour. It's a bad bad place. There's always a million songs running through my head, only one was playing on my insane jukebox at the moment: Nobody Knows It But Me by Tony Rich Project (the lyrics to which I shall post in my next post). My pulse thundered in my ears as I walked past that very chair and table I had sat on that evening. Everything was in shart focus and I could hear every little sound clear as crystal. There were classmates behind me talking about how cool laser storm is; there was my friend who's clothes were rustling as she walked with me; there were footsteps emanating from all directions, echoing in my mind. I saw myself at that table with my teachers and friends around me. Through that window, looking at a vacant chair and table, I realized what I had become and it was a release. It felt good. I even played a round of laser storm and you know what? It is pretty cool. Between donuts and milkshakes, I had come across a beautiful epiphany. I had been ready to give up yesterday, but today I had stumbled across the fact that in my many and varied miseries, I had completely over-seen some things and it was time to make up for them. We set out for Peshawar somewhere around 8:00.
First stop was Shakkarparriyan. It's pretty little place cut up into the hills somewhere above Islamabad. Marble benches and columns dot the place and there's steps everywhere. Going up, down, sideways. Nice little place I guess. I'm always drawn to vistas where I can spend some time alone and just gaze out at like a forest or a city or something. Oh well, spent some time there. Some of us went on a pirate boat, some of us climbed trees, some of us got into a police pickup van and took pictures in the back (yeah, that'll happen one of these days for sure), some of us got high on hash and I just sat on a stair step writing down what I thought about a friend in her diary. Then, onwards to Jinnah Super, where one of us actually went to get a hair-cut. Was well funny as the guy messed up his hair. The only thing worth mentioning here (cos it gives me brownie points) is the fact that I bought a pair of earrings for another friend who had to miss the trip and who I had spent most of the night texting and consoling. I felt really bad she had missed it, cos she's like my best friend and I hate it when I hear her crying. Had lunch and then it was off to that MegaZone place cos people wanted to bowl and play laser tag and stuff. Now this place gives me bad bad vibes; this is the place where I broke down on the last trip and cried for like a good one hour. It's a bad bad place. There's always a million songs running through my head, only one was playing on my insane jukebox at the moment: Nobody Knows It But Me by Tony Rich Project (the lyrics to which I shall post in my next post). My pulse thundered in my ears as I walked past that very chair and table I had sat on that evening. Everything was in shart focus and I could hear every little sound clear as crystal. There were classmates behind me talking about how cool laser storm is; there was my friend who's clothes were rustling as she walked with me; there were footsteps emanating from all directions, echoing in my mind. I saw myself at that table with my teachers and friends around me. Through that window, looking at a vacant chair and table, I realized what I had become and it was a release. It felt good. I even played a round of laser storm and you know what? It is pretty cool. Between donuts and milkshakes, I had come across a beautiful epiphany. I had been ready to give up yesterday, but today I had stumbled across the fact that in my many and varied miseries, I had completely over-seen some things and it was time to make up for them. We set out for Peshawar somewhere around 8:00.
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